I wake up with a start. When I open my eyes I see only darkness around me – in other words: I see nothing.
Breathing heavily and sweating buckets I try to clear my head. It's not easy – nothing in my mind is lucid, nothing at all. But I try anyway.
I think of yesterday – yesterday night. Of what he said. Of what Davous said.
All the words, his and my own, float through my mind, making me dizzy. It's so much. It's not just the words. The things I felt, remembering that is what really makes my head spin. It's all so strange, all so . . . new.
What is happening to me? Why do I react to him the way I do? Why do I feel so betrayed?
Lying awake last night, racking my brain over everything, the only thing that really held, that stuck with me through all the hours, was the sense of betrayal.
When I had finally admitted to feel this – which took quite some time because of my stubbornness and pride – I asked myself how I can feel so betrayed by a person